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Hobby Pox

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New Disease Affecting Hobbyists:

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The Journal of the AMA today announced that a new disease that seems to affect R/C Hobbyists, model builders and certain others, has been defined for the first time. It has been given the tentative name of Hobby Pox.....

Warning: This disease is so contagious that it can be caught just by watching someone infected with it.

Symptoms include:

Insane desire to infect friends and anyone else in ear shot. Seemingly childish desire to play with insanely expensive toy airplanes, boats and cars. Perpetual silly grin on face. Particularly right after finishing an eight hour building binge and two bottles of super glue.  Victim is often heard to scream at frequent intervals: “I got it, I got it, OH NO!!!” or “I’m Dead stick”   Pleas for urgent help to God and even bystanders are not uncommon.  Makes irrational statements like: “I never did like that plane anyway.”, “It’s only money.”,”Did you see that thing hit the ground, Wow!”, “I meant to do that.”, and the very common statement  “It was a radio glitch.” (sometimes repeated over and over like a mantra. )

Victims tend to band together and form support clubs.  Are known to stand in the full sun staring at the sky, on days when the temperature is over 90. Get up early to cut grass.... but only at the field. Have a compulsion to lie about the price of equipment either increasing or decreasing the price depending on who is listening.

How to tell if your loved one is affected.

Strange charges on your credit cards.

Often smells like castor oil, nitromethane or various paints and glues.  Weed eater mysteriously found disassembled and the engine missing just about the time they started flying giant scale airplanes.  Often found wondering glassy eyed in or near hobby shops.  Found at least once glued to the workbench frantically trying to reach the debonder.

Disappears into work shop for hours/days at a time often followed by mad dashes to a hobby shop at five minutes to closing.  Consumes more alcohol for fuel in a weekend than an alcoholic does on a six day drunk.

Comes home carrying a bewildering array of balsa sticks and brightly colored covering........Sometimes returning from a hobby store and sometimes from the flying field.

No matter how hard you clean, the house is still covered with a fine brownish white dust sometimes to a depth of several inches near the work shop.

Nervous chewing of glue from finger tips.

Often have stiff necks from looking at sky.

Inordinate concern about the weather particularly wind and rain.

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MACH SPEED HOBBIES POLICIES